now that i’ve met you, would you object to never seeing each other again?

Okay. I don’t know if you guys know this, but Rebecca is not, in fact, my name. However, there have been MULTIPLE instances lately wherein I am newly christened Rebecca and expected to respond to my freshly acquired moniker. By different people. All over southern California. In fact, unlike other people on this site, Kim is my real name. Sort of. Mostly. At any rate, it’s what people ACTUALLY call me. I mean, I’ve got a lot of nicknames, but generally, they are not two syllables longer than my given one.

So I got to thinking. Maybe I just LOOK like a Rebecca. Exhibit A:

What I actually look like.

Note the dimple. Not because it’s important, but because it’s adorable. Go ahead. NOTE it.

Now, let’s compare to some other people who are ACTUALLY named Rebecca:

one night in paris, and then breakfast at tiffany’s

So I guess what I want to know is: when did we decide that we were going to settle for grossly inadequate pornography? Sure, in terms of achieving sexual gratification, Michaelangeo’s David need not be involved. Long before Deep Throat introduced us to the wild world of political and sexual intrigue (thus justifying the existence of nerdy analysts everywhere), sex and art had been inextricably entwined since time immemorial; classic art being but a topical contribution to the glorification of fertility- dating back to prehistoric idols flaunting grotesquely exaggerated hips and busts. It is no wonder at all that Freud found sexuality latent in pre-modern society, lounging beneath the surface of our newly acquired hypermorality. By the time we resigned Betamax and our Victorian sensibilities to the scrap heap, profligately abandoning ourselves to all VHS’ wanderlust of retrospandex had to offer, we had welcomed the ubiquity of media sexuality into our homes. By the end of the century, pornchic existed not only as an homage to the act of physical release, but as a movement celebrating the culturally normative integration of sexual emancipation and mainstream media. So what has changed?